Forgiveness is Love

 

No matter what your goals, you cannot move forward until you forgive your loved ones, friends, yourself or even strangers who harmed and wronged you, whether deliberately or unintentionally.

When you feel forgiveness in your heart, it is easier to be happy, healthy, accomplish your goals and be at peace with yourself.  You see, forgiving another is really less about other people and more about being true, kind and respectful of ourselves.  Not forgiving someone else and not repenting for the wrongs you've committed can:

• Keep you trapped in anger and resentment
• Make you feel helpless, stuck and frustrated
• Harm you physically or emotionally
• Stop you from enjoying relationships or reveling in your accomplishments

On the other hand, forgiving others or asking for forgiveness can:

• Free, heal, nurture and release you
• Fill you with lightness, compassion and good will
• Empower and enliven you
• Bring you closer to God or goodness
• Refresh, reward and renew you

The following seven steps are important when a person needs to forgive someone else, or forgive themselves:

Face reality:  Own up to the reality that you need to forgive another person or yourself. If you don't accept that you're stuck in a bitter, unforgiving, intolerant quicksand, you'll never get out of your rut to live a sweet, fulfilling, and enriching life.

Out with the anger:   Even if you feel that the other person's offenses are real and your anger is justified, you should resolve to shed your resentment and anger.   Anger kept inside will just fester and will give you grey hair and wrinkles!

Remember that we are not perfect:   No one is perfect, and I think that we need to take a good look into our own thoughts and lives to see if we need to seek forgiveness from anyone. 

Give the benefit of the doubt:   Realize that, in most instances, the person(s) who harmed you was probably being either selfish or self-involved and was not out to hurt you. But if she or he had underlying, callous, unkind thoughts, then shower that person with pity, kindness and empathy. Looking at these "sinners"-or even yourself-with this kind of compassion and understanding can help to release you.

Imagine what forgiveness feels like:  Now visualize yourself breaking free with forgiveness. Pray to God for forgiveness, too.  Through Him all things are possible.

Value the experience:   Realize that forgiveness can be powerful and effective-perhaps as important as eating nourishing foods, exercising and believing in you. Acknowledge that letting go of anger and resentment can totally transform and improve your life.   I have seen this in my own life.

Embrace forgiveness:   Approaching another to apologize completes your 7-step process and helps you to achieve a joyous, merciful frame of mind. (If the person is no longer on this earth, imagine yourself humbly asking forgiveness and the other person pardoning you.)

I am one of those people that have difficulty with forgiving, but this past week I was able to forgive someone who hurt me dearly over the past couple of years.  Now, I didn’t say I forgot about his wrong doings (I am working on that one), but I have found it in my heart to forgive him.   I will spare you all the sordid details, but let me just say that what was done to me was hurtful, disrespectful, and outright deceitful.   Why did I stay with this person???  That is another subject for another day people.


The act of forgiveness is something that we should teach our children early on.  Along with teaching the act of forgiveness we should also be teaching them that is okay to admit that we did something wrong and apologize.  This goes along with taking responsibility for our own actions.  Nothing drives me crazier than to know someone who blames their mistakes on everyone else. 


Forgiveness is uplifting, gives us a clean state of mind, and allows us to move forward with our life. 

“To forgive is the highest, most beautiful form of love. In return, you will receive untold peace and happiness.”

 ~ Robert Muller

Here’s to getting off the comfort couch and living life ~ Lisa